Friday, May 23, 2008

I Love All Of You!!

It was really, really unexpected... Everything was wonderful after the exam. The Holiday has just begun, my grades were somehow better than last year's, Nabari no Ou is sooo Awesome, Yoite is so gorgeous, Canteen Day is so near the corner, the concert preparation is so fun, challenging and mind twisting and I'm really looking forward to go to the workshop tomorrow morning. Just when life was getting really fun, busy, and more enjoyable and I didn't expect anything to ruin my perfectly happy life, something really did happen...

It was 12:30 pm, I was onlining already, uploading my blogskin... My 'mother' (the other one) came back, looking perfectly normal like she used to... After unloading some packages from her car, she left. Later, I gave up on making the internet budge, I switched off the com. Feeling a bit tired due to my lack of sleep last night (I'm stubborn, I won't sleep unless it's late), I lied onto the sofa.

Then, she (my mother) came back again. Lazy to open the door for her, I pretended to be asleep. Right after she parked her car, my dad came back too... After they came in, I continue to pretend sleeping, until when I heard my dad said, 'He could be lying there for 2 to 3 days already!'. Lying for 2-3 days without being noticed?? Is that person still alive?? I was curious and started to listen to their conversation.

It seems that my mum's godmother had noticed that her neighbor's kitchen's light wasn't on as usual. Which makes her realize that her neighbor is missing! So, here comes the police. I drifted away for a bit after dad started to talk the phone since it was boring... But he said something that caught my attention again and stunned me...

'Please arrange those, I won't be free because my father-in-law has just passed away.'

What??!! Father-in-law?? Immediately I got up, pretending to be just awake. I walk towards them, rubbing my eye. My mum's puffy red eye and my dad's grief tone confirmed what I'd overheard... No way!! He's so young!! 61 only!

First time in my life, I lost my words. I was really stunned, though I can still think... I don't know what am I suppose to do.. Cry? Say something? Ask something? I didn't cry, yet. Maybe I will, and maybe I won't. Indifferent, cold-blooded, apathetic you might say... But I really don't know. He is my grandfather, but not blood-related. In fact, he's one year younger than my uncle!!

It was shock that I felt instead of grief... I don't really know him, the time I spent with him is even less than the time I spent with the Black Thing... He lived in Raub and we rarely meet or talk... I felt kinda guilty for not shedding any tears for him. My nose felt sour, my eyes wet, and yet my heart don't feel like crying...

My mum's (the one who lost her father) is really tough, I respect her for that. She wiped her tears swiftly and started to inform her relatives. We overheard her telling someone on the phone that her father's body was found in the hill where he grew rubber trees. It seems that he had an accident and... We won't be getting back his body yet, the police needs to examine his body first... It's really sad, to have your family member being... Can we skip the word?? Other than that, she even lectured us!

'You see what happened to Wai gong!! Don't always think that others are 'popomama'. He didn't listen to us and hire some workers to help him, and see what happened~~'
She's really something...

I've never really lost anyone quite close to me before. Last time it was my uncle who lived in Johor. My cousin lost his father and before that another lost his grandmother. I didn't cry for them, I didn't know them well. I still have everyone who're important to me, how I wish everything won't change, but that's not possible...

So, before it's too late, I just wanna say it again,


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