UPSR

Ramblings. Dedicated to my brother.
Go away if you don't want to know how annoying tutoring a slow learner can be.
Yeah right Jiri, this is where I learned to teach things step-by-step, so go thank him.

*
I don't get it.

I'm not taking it, why hell I took UPSR like 6 years ago, and yet,
WHY AM I GETTING ALL STRESSED BECAUSE OF IT?

My brother's academic grade screams 'FAIL ME!!!!!!!' all over.

I don't even dare to ask him, 'Do you understand what the question asks?', since he's gonna answer me with these:

1. No
2. I don't understand a few words.
3. No
4. A little
5. No
6. Still NO

*SIGHS*

He's like, 75% illiterate...

Ok ok ok ok ok ok ok okokokokokokok....

I know it's not his fault for being slow, he's a boy and boys tend to be a bit slower than girls at this age and I hope he's just a late bloomer... Then again, it's not like he wants to be born not being smart or genius like the rest of the family...

BUT,

*SIGHS*

Seriously, I don't know what to say.

*SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS*

I don't care la. Just get over with UPSR. It doesn't matter if he fails or passes (well obviously the best outcome) his BM, there's always remove there for him to catch up... *Heaves* Though, with his Chinese, he's gonna be the first ever out of our family for failing Chinese.

GAWD. Imagine the terror of my grandparents on this, especially my grandma, who enjoys drilling the success of my cousins into our ears everytime she sees us. Believe me, I can tell you what she's gonna say the moment she starts 'Your gogo...'

So. Damn. Stressed.

I tried making him to check the dic for unknown words from the essays and exercises. Then I realize that if he were to do that, it'll take him years coz he'll have to check almost every word.
I gave up.

I told him to improve his cacing words, I see no change made.
I asked him to memorize his penjodoh bilangan, he took the whole day for half-a-page and forgets the second day.
I ordered him to check the dic, he couldn't find half the words he doesn't understand because he didn't get the imbuhan.
I made him read, and he mumbles the whole time while he can yell louder than me when he's angry.
I want him to try guessing the meaning of the sentence which he doesn't understand like fitting a puzzle, and he took god-knows-how-long to guess.
I was so tired that I rested my leg on his chair, he shifted the bloody chair away from me.
I was so annoyed everytime he claimed to have no time to do this and that while he screams, yells, thrashes, and whines at my sister.
I tired to keep calm and make life easy for everyone, but I DON'T KNOW WHY I GET ALL FLARE-UP WHEN HE DOESN'T LISTEN.

Use love to educate like what happen in a lot of stories, I thought. Sure, the boy is bad, but someone loves him and he becomes good and lovable. IT'S DAMN EASY, NOT.

GAWD.

He takes so long to finish something.
He's so easily distracted.
He's so unfocused!!!!!!!!!!
He doesn't use his brain to think.
His handwriting is DEVASTATING.
He seems to be talking under water when he reads.
He does things so slow, like walking, pointing at a work, or even flipping through a dic.
He tells me he wants to pass, but he doesn't remember what I taught him.
He says he's doing his best, I don't know what to believe anymore.

Am I impatient? I don't know. All I know is, he can do it. But why is he not doing what he can? Is it me or him? I just don't get it, why can't he

I know the academic grade doesn't measure a person's talent/smartness/whatever, but this is MALAYSIA (which generally explains almost everything you're not happy with), it's a somehow outdated country that loves the nerds and geeks and doesn't really care about those with unusual talents.

So what if my brother has some talent (which, till date is yet to be discovered), can he survive with it?

GAH.

WHY AM I GETTING SO STRESSED BECAUSE OF THIS STUPID EXAM? IT'S NOT MINE. JUST GO AWAY.

I DON'T GET TO GO OUT BECAUSE OF THIS.
I DON'T GET TO DO MY THINGS BECAUSE OF THIS.
I DON'T GET TO SLEEP BECAUSE OF THIS.
I DON'T GET TO STAY COOL BECAUSE OF THIS.
I DON'T GET TO RELAX BECAUSE OF THIS.

WHEN THIS IS SERIOUSLY OVER, I'M GOING TO DEMAND THAT DICTATOR TO LET ME GO OUT AS I PLEASED. I'VE DONE THIS MUCH FOR HIM, I DON'T GET TO GO TO CHINA WITH THEM AND BLA-BLA-BLA SO AT LEAST LET ME ENJOY WHATEVER'S LEFT.

And if, he so happens to have pass everything, I'm taking full credit for it. Though, it's totally a different case if he fails.

I think when this is over,
I'm going to start teaching him from scratch, and that is Standard 1.